Sometimes being a country music fan isn’t easy. I personally hate having to clarify, “I mean like, good county music not ‘beer, beer, truck truck, girl, dirt road’ country,” when I tell people what kind of music I enjoy. But, it’s one of the only ways to avoid the judgmental looks that usually come with the admission of enjoying one of the nation’s most popular genres. Some of the biggest nostalgic country songs are to blame for this distinction.
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These country songs prove that “nostalgic” and “good” aren’t always the same thing. No amount of longing for simpler times would make me listen to one of the songs listed below on purpose. In fact, if I never hear these songs again, it will be too soon.
[RELATED: 3 One-Hit Wonders From the 1980s I’d Be Fine With Never Hearing Again]
1. “Achy Breaky Heart” by Billy Ray Cyrus
Written by Don Von Tress, Billy Ray Cyrus released “Achy Breaky Heart” as the lead single from his debut album Some Gave All in 1992. The song was a massive hit in the United States. It peaked at No. 4 on the all-genre Billboard Hot 100 chart and topped the Hot Country Songs chart. Additionally, it was a massive hit abroad and became the first country single to receive a Platinum Certification from the RIAA since the iconic Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers duet “Islands in the Stream” got one in 1983. It was also inescapable on both pop and country radio.
How this “nostalgic” song that sounds like a parody of country music became such a massive hit is beyond me. In a sea of great country music with relatable lyrics that didn’t kill brain cells, this song never should have made it. But it did. Luckily, it has fallen out of popularity and radio stations no longer play this torturous line dance soundtrack every hour on the hour anymore.
2. “She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy” by Kenny Chesney
Written by Jim Collins and Paul Overstreet, Kenny Chesney released “She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy” as the third single from his 1999 album Everywhere We Go. It went to No. 11 on the Hot Country Songs chart and received a Gold Certification from the RIAA. It is also somehow among Chesney’s most popular songs.
Chesney has some good songs and Overstreet is a top-notch songwriter. In my opinion, this song proves that everyone has an off-day every now and then. “She Thinks My Tractor’s Sexy” sounds like something a singer would perform in a spoof movie about modern country music.
3. “Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)” by Big & Rich
Written by John Rich and Big Kenny, Big & Rich released this atrocity as the second single from their 2004 album Horse of a Different Color. It peaked at No. 11 on the Hot Country Songs chart and has appeared in multiple commercials, TV shows, movies, and nightmares of people with decent taste in music.
Really, anything by Big & Rich could have fit on this list. Their brand of rap-infused bro-country is akin to auditory torture. However, “Save a Horse (Ride a Cowboy)” might be their worst offense. I think I’d rather sit in silence than hear this song again.
4. “Elvira” by The Oak Ridge Boys
Written by Dallas Frazier, The Oak Ridge Boys released “Elvira” as a single from their 1981 album Fancy Free. It was a massive hit for the Oaks, landing at No. 1 on the country chart and No. 5 on the Hot 100. The song also brought the group a pair of Platinum Certifications from the RIAA and a Grammy Award. This nostalgic crossover country song is still a favorite among fans of the legendary group.
The Oak Ridge Boys have some outstanding music. The late, great Joe Bonsall’s peerless bass voice is on full display in this track. However, I can’t remember the last time I listened to this song in its entirety on purpose. Usually, I hit the “skip” button about halfway through the song’s opening chorus. However, I do find myself revisiting the rest of their catalog.
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