Writing a song in tribute to a loved one can be a rewarding experience. The tricky part is creating a song that not only serves those cathartic purposes, but also one that other listeners can understand and appreciate.
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Bono wrote the song “Sometimes You Can’t Make Your Mind” in honor of his father. After fiddling with the track for years, he and the band fell upon a version that dispensed wisdom and insight to listeners while also creating an indelible portrait of the honoree.
The Hewson Men
Bono started writing the song that would become “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own” in the neighborhood of seven years before it was released. When he began working on it, with The Edge helping out on the musical side of it, his father, Bob Hewson, was dealing with a cancer diagnosis.
Father and son had endured a somewhat difficult relationship in Bono’s formative years. But as Bob Hewson neared the end of his life, that relationship was largely repaired. That’s evident in the lyrics of “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own”. They hint at previous clashes, but also come from a place of deep understanding.
Turning the song into one that would make sense as a recording proved difficult. Bono sang an early version at his father’s funeral in 2001. When the band was putting together its 2004 album How To Dismantle An Atomic Bomb, they worked with multiple producers, a couple of whom helped get “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own” across the finish line.
Daniel Lanois devised the quiet opening for the track. And Steve Lillywhite insisted on a segment that would get the song from the verses to the refrain, which led to the soaring pre-chorus section featuring Bono’s falsetto vocals.
Exploring the Lyrics of “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own”
What’s fascinating about “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own” is how Bono blurs the lines in the lyrics. At times, we’re not sure if father is talking to son or son is talking to father. But we can tell that these two stubborn men are coming to a point where they’re willing to let the past go and be there for each other at the moment when support is needed most.
“You don’t have to put up a fight,” Bono sings in the spirit of amity. “You don’t have to always be right/Let me take some of the punches for you tonight.” He doesn’t sugarcoat the way they butted heads, perhaps because of their similarities. “I don’t need to hear you say,” he explains. “That if we weren’t so alike/You’d like me a whole lot more.”
In the middle eight, the son admits his frustration at how they fell out once upon a time. What matters is that the old man’s spirit burns strong in the younger one. “You’re the reason I sing,” Bono bellows. “You’re the reason why the opera is in me.” That line refers to Bob Hewson’s love of opera.
“Don’t leave me here alone,” Bono beckons, a touchingly vulnerable message to his Dad. “And it’s you when I look in the mirror,” he sings to his father. “And it’s you that makes it hard to let go/Sometimes you can’t make it on your own.”
This is as personal a song as U2 has ever delivered. But Bono’s lyrics for “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own” could easily apply to any two family members who, after years of going their separate ways, reunite just in time.
Photo by Kevin Winter/Getty Images
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