When Bon Iver’s Justin Vernon discussed his single “If Only I Could Wait”, he said he couldn’t get through the track without sobbing. It features Danielle Haim in a tender duet inspired by classic country duos.
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It took several years to complete. But it also required Vernon, Haim, and producer Jim-E Stack to endure a snowstorm before the gorgeous song emerged. It appears on Bon Iver’s fifth studio album, Sable, Fable, and was released as a double single with “Walk Home”.
About “If Only I Could Wait”
The musicians were snowed in at Vernon’s Wisconsin studio. Stack started with a simple hi-hat loop, but the track took shape when he accidentally played a keyboard sample. Instantly, Vernon heard a song inside the loop.
“If Only I Could Wait”—earthy R&B meets soft rock—begins with Vernon repeating the title. He was testing the microphone volume, but left it in the final mix. Then Vernon and Haim began improvising melodies, and it quickly became apparent that this was going to be a duet.
If only I could wait
But before me is a ways out
Can I live inside this state?
Where the summers are charades now
Can I incur the weight?
Am I really this afraid now?
In describing the song, Vernon called it “A bilateral crying question. How long can the two of us hang on to each other?” For the “bilateral crying question,” Vernon and Haim drew from iconic country duos like Johnny Cash and June Carter, George Jones and Tammy Wynette.
If only you could wait
I ain’t up at your pace yet
I take the steps to stage
And they hit me with the rays now.
But if I could only pray
In the blaze of a northern bar
I’d bend another straight
We’ll decay in other ways now.
Layers of Love and Sadness
The layers of orchestration hold much of the song’s emotion. Thinking about the cold isolation of a snowstorm, and the fear of loneliness chasing every relationship. The fear of loss that accompanies love. And when it overlaps, it creates the moment when something beautiful also feels sad because we can’t help but think of losing what means the most.
Relationships are tenuous. Two people, hopefully, in sync, but required to move as individuals. Vernon and Haim plead to hang on. If only.
Photo by Michal Augustini
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