In 2012, “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” was everywhere on the radio. Taylor Swift’s newest song was the lead single from her upcoming album, Red. But it was a major change for the country music sweetheart—the change being that it wasn’t a country song at all.
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Swift had become famous over the previous few years for her girl-next-door image and yearning, banjo-tinged ballads. But “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” was a bubblegum pop song full of attitude. And, it was a massive hit. It became her first song to climb to No. 1 on the Billboard Hot 100. But more importantly, it proved Taylor Swift could cross over and retain a permanent place in pop music.
The music video for “Never Ever” also offered a new perspective. In it, Swift wore pajamas and bright red lipstick. Surrounded by backup singers in animal costumes, she grooved her way through a breakup song that sure didn’t evoke misery or heartbreak. Heck, it was downright celebratory!
Swift’s new image as a confident, sassy pop star made waves. In the wake of several high-profile relationships over the years prior, rumors inevitably started to swirl. Who, exactly, was it who inspired her sassy new track, and what was the meaning behind it?
The Inspiration
In the early 2010s, Swift was moving steadily away from country music. Her upcoming album, Red, was her most pop-oriented work by far. But she still didn’t have a lead single.
The last few years had been busy for the star. She’d won her first Grammy in 2009, and she had also had several relationships with fellow celebrities, which, of course, drew intense media scrutiny.
Shortly after a breakup, Swift ran into an acquaintance in the recording studio. As they chatted, he asked her if the rumors were true about her and her ex getting back together.
“It’s a song that just kind of happened,” she told Billboard. “I was in the studio, and this guy who walked in was a friend of my ex’s. And he made some comment about how he heard how I was gonna get back together with my ex. And after that happened I just grabbed my guitar.”
The Relationship Behind the Song
Swift has always been private about the people who inspire her songs. But sharp-eyed fans have long speculated that “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” is about actor Jake Gyllenhaal.
Gyllenhaal and Swift dated from autumn of 2010 to January 2011. Though their relationship lasted just a few months, it affected Swift deeply. The actor inspired a number of her songs, including “All Too Well,” “I Almost Do,” and “The Moment I Knew.”
Gyllenhaal has never gone into detail about his time dating the singer. But there are a few clues that point to him being the inspiration behind “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together.”
The Lyrics
“We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” is incredibly fun to listen to, and sing along with. Not only is it a catchy song, but the lyrics are also playful and full of attitude.
We hadn’t seen each other in a month
When you said you needed “space”—what?
Many of Swift’s songs about Gyllenhaal suggest she felt like she was more invested in their relationship than he was. In her song “I Bet You Think About Me”—widely considered to likewise have been inspired by the actor—she expresses similar sentiments: Mr. Superior-Thinkin’ / Do you have all the space that you need?
I say “I hate you,” we break up
You call me: “I love you”
[RELATED: The Meaning Behind “Red,” Taylor Swift’s Requiem for a Dead-End Maserati of a Love Affair]
Several songs inspired by Gyllenhaal imply they would break up, then have an emotional phone call and get back together again. Swift would come to see how toxic that cycle is, however. She’s making clear in the song that she’s determined never to put herself in this miserable position again.
The anonymous friend who asked her whether she was getting back with her ex also gets a nod in the lyrics. It’s clear there was a lot of gossip being passed back and forth among friend groups.
You go talk to your friends,
Talk to my friends, talk to me
But we are never, ever, ever getting back together
The song includes a reference to the fact that Gyllenhaal seemed not to like her music:
You’d go hide away and find your peace of mind
With some indie record that’s much cooler than mine
This is a regular theme in Swift’s songs about the actor. She felt he looked down on her for singing pop music and thought his own music taste was superior to hers. “I’d get nothing but eye rolls from listening to the music I like,” she told Taste of Country. “It was a big point of contention in that relationship.”
The mention of indie music might also be a sly reference to another Gyllenhaal ex-girlfriend, Jenny Lewis. Lewis, a former child actor, well-known solo artist, and the singer for indie darlings Rilo Kiley, was the actor’s date to the Golden Globes shortly after he and Swift called it quits.
The Bottom Line
Ironically, Gyllenhaal’s distaste for pop music may have been the driving force behind Swift becoming the pop icon she is today. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” was, after all, her first No. 1 hit on the mainstream charts. It was the introduction to her hugely successful pop album, Red, too—a record that moved her decisively out of the country genre. Swift’s bubblegum pop-style breakup song was as in-your-face as possible, in its meaning and in its accessibility—all for the purpose of annoying an ex.
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