In response to feedback from the American Songwriter Community, the esteemed contest judges were asked to share some insights into their winner selections. Read below for insights into how the panel of judges picked the winners for the January/February Lyric Contest.
1st Place – “The Woman in Black” By Tracy Richardson
Dave Bassett – the line “I was the girl in white a few years back, Now I’m the woman in black” hit me as a great turn of phrase utilizing the flip from girl to woman and white to black effectively and efficiently and in an original way. Great meter and flow as well in the chorus. A story clearly told and easy to understand but not over-complicated with too many details. Also, I was immediately engaged emotionally and was at the same time able to hear this as a song with melodies popping into my head as I read. For me, it is a huge feat to create that distinction between just being a Poem and feeling like a song.
Judy Stakee – Loved the lines Was in a woman in white, now I’m a woman in black” and I felt the sadness and vulnerability in each line of this story. Simple but very poignant.
Lyrics:
We stood in those long lonely lines
It seems like a hundred times
Waiting to pay our respects
Wond’rin’ which one would be next
Now we know…
I’m not ready, you’re too young
Now the plans we made are comin’ undone
I’m your steady, you’re my rock
Now the earth is shakin’ and it wont stop
I was the girl in white a few years back
Now I’m the woman in black
The hardest thing I’ve ever done
Was callin’ our daughters and our son
There ain’t no way to break someone’s heart tenderly
But you would’ve done it so much better than me
I’m not ready, you’re too young
Now the plans we made are comin’ undone
I’m your steady, you’re my rock
Now the earth is shakin’ and it wont stop
I was the girl in white a few years back
Now I’m the woman in black
I still feel you
But damn I miss you
I’m not ready, you’re too young
Now the plans we made are comin’ undone
I’m your steady, you’re my rock
Now the earth is shakin’ and it wont stop
I was the girl in white a few years back
Now I’m the woman in black
Since 1984, American Songwriter’s Lyric Contest has helped aspiring songwriters get noticed and have fun. Enter today before the deadline:
2nd Place – “Borders & Fences” By Herbert Wolven
Sharon Vaughn – “The metaphors of the fences are quite soulful…”
Dave Bassett – “I was immediately engaged by the title and then by the open, desolate feeling of love, loss and searching. The phrase “some hold me out and some hold you in” really summed up the title’s purpose and defined the conflict well. I was able to grasp the meter and flow without much effort and that is what made me feel that this lyric was more than great poetry but could also be a great song.”
Sarah Siskind – “The lyrics translated a certain maturity. I liked the unexpected twists like “some hold me out and some hold you in.”
Lyrics:
There’s trees that line this highway, Fields turning green
Miles and miles of farmland with nothing in between
No matter where I go, you’re always on my mind
Can’t run away by crossing state lines
and those borders and fences
tell me where I’ve been
some hold me out
and some hold you in
a few are broken, some I need to mend
Borders and Fences, tell me where I’ve been
The night sky’s filled with lightning, clouds in shades of grey
I keep having a vision the rain can’t wash away
It was the last time that I kissed you, you became a part of me
Now I remember how love’s supposed to be
and those borders and fences
tell me where I’ve been
some hold me out
and some hold you in
a few are broken, some I need to mend
Borders and Fences, tell me where I’ve been
Every day this highway shows me something new
I’ve crossed the great divide where rivers cut through
and I’m looking for direction to a place I thought I knew
Hoping to find the way back to you
and those borders and fences
tell me where I’ve been
some hold me out
and some hold you in
a few are broken, some I need to mend
Borders and Fences, tell me where I’ve been
and I’m trying to find…. where that fence line ends.
3rd Place – “Love Was A Lie” By Benjamin Mason
Pam Sheyne – “This is a well-structured song lyric with a solid storyline and great use of repetition strengthening the title and concept. I felt compassion for the main character of the song and loved the descriptive imagery of the storyline. However, I would have loved to have heard more about the “you” in the song and how that person made you feel”.
Lyrics:
RAISING BABIES, WHO’S GOT TIME?
I’VE GOT MY NAME ON A NEON SIGN
UP ON STAGE IN PRETTY BLUE LIGHT
I DON’T NEED TO GROW UP TONIGHT
I HAD FLASH AND SNAKE SKIN BOOTS
TOO MANY GIGS TO PUT DOWN ROOTS
LOVE WAS A LIE IN A MOTEL ROOM
LOVE WAS A LIE ‘TIL I MET YOU
MY FIRST CHILDREN WERE MY SONGS
THEY WERE HAPPY WHEN YOU CAME ALONG
WHEN YOU LEFT AND THE HOUSE TURNED COLD
THEY WERE ALL I HAD TO HOLD
I HAD FIRE AND A BRUSH WITH FAME
NOW NOBODY’S CLAPPING AND CALLING MY NAME
LOVE WAS A LIE BUT I MADE IT SOUND TRUE
LOVE WAS A LIE ‘TIL I MET YOU
SHADOWS RUN THROUGH THIS OLD HOUSE
IN GOLDEN LIGHT THAT NEVER GOES OUT
FINGER PRINTS ON WINDOW PANES
FROM LITTLE ANGELS WHO FLEW AWAY
PRECIOUS GHOSTS WHO STAY WITH ME
THAT’S THE BLESSING OF MEMORY
LOVE WAS A LIE I FINALLY SAW THROUGH
LOVE WAS A LIE ‘TIL I MET YOU
LOVE WAS A LIE I FINALLY SAW THROUGH
LOVE WAS A LIE ‘TIL I MET YOU
Since 1984, American Songwriter’s Lyric Contest has helped aspiring songwriters get noticed and have fun. Enter today before the deadline:
4th Place – “A Stone’s Throw From The Sun” By Jim Allen
Sarah Siskind – I always love strong opening lines in a song, and these first couple of lines drew me in. I also love the sentiment of danger being too close to the sun but not all the way as to burn.
Lyrics:
She pulls the daylight from the dark
moving mountains with her heart
paints the valleys green and gold
when she weeps the rivers flow
rain and thunder
and I wonder what’s to come
a stone’s throw from the sun
Shadow dancer with the moon
waves her hand
and the deserts bloom
you can tell she’s been around
a million ages in this town
her beauty plundered
and I wonder what’s to come
a stone’s throw ftom the sun
and if you listen she’ll confide
all her secrets deep inside
with a whisper on the breeze
a hurricane she weaves
from a butterfly
Seven oceans in her eyes
gazing as the glaciers slide
one more mother on the run
beneath the shadow of a gun
tonight she’s praying
for the light of day to come
a stone’s throw from the sun
and if you listen she’ll confide
all her secrets deep inside
with a whisper on the breeze
a hurricane she weaves
from a butterfly
and I wonder what’s to come
a stone’s throw from the sun
